The Uninspected Bathroom
by I.have.a.tiara
Summary: After Sheldon says he bathed in Howardette's bathroom, they find out that he and Amy had coitus in their room.


**I'm the only one who thought that Sheldon was going to say something about intercourse when he said he had bathed at Bernadette's house? Anyway, I hope you like it. Comments are always welcome.**

-How did the inspector not flag this when I came to check out your bathroom renovation?-he ask looking at Howard that hesitate a few seconds to answer- Are you telling me that I have showered in an uninspected bathroom?

-You showered in our house? - Bernadette looked surprised at Sheldon and Amy closed her eyes tightly hoping that Sheldon was not going to say what she imagined.

-Amy and I had coitus in your room, so what did you expect me to do?- Sheldon said with all the tranquility of the world while his wife turned to see her friends who had their mouths wide open in surprise.

-You did that where? - asked Howard who was the first to react.

-We had coitus in your room- Sheldon repeated.

-Are you crazy? Why you have sex in someone else's bed! - Bernadette complained annoyed.

-You seem to have forgotten that you conceived Halley in Sheldon's old bed- Amy reminded them.

-Yes, well ... -not Howard or Bernadette knew what to say- So it was a revenge or what?

-No. We did that on Halley's first birthday.

-You did what?

-To have revenge coitus in your room.

-Are you saying they've had sex twice in our room?- Howard asked between annoyed and surprised.

-That's right- confirmed Sheldon calmly.

-On the day of my daughter's birthday party?- Bernadette was starting to get annoyed again. -How did you come up with that?-

-It was also Amy's birthday and we had to celebrate it according to what is established in our relationship agreement. According to paragraph E section ...

-I'm not interested on hearing about that- Bernadette said, and Sheldon grimaced at being interrupted. -Why the hell didn't you wait to go back to your apartment?

-I had been wanting to make love to her all day and in that moment we finally felt better so ...- He shrugged.

-Oh shit- Sheldon frowned when he heard her talk like that- I'm sorry, but what you just said was very nice.

-So Aren't you angry anymore?- Amy asked, worried that her friends had bothered with them.

-I suppose not- replied Howard after looking at his wife who shook her head. They all kept silent for a few seconds- So...

-So what?- Sheldon asked without understanding.

-I think Howard wants to know how we ended up having sex for the second time in their room, isn't it?

-Yes. I want to know how the hell Sheldon "I'm not a slave to my basic needs like everyone else" Cooper has had sex twice in my house-he said with a smile when he saw the face Sheldon had put on.

-I don't think it's a good idea to tell them- said Amy putting her hand on Sheldon's arm.

-Please-said Bernadette-We will not tell the others. Sheldon looked at her because he knew it was the first thing they would do.

-Fine- he accept- Do you remember a couple of weeks ago that you asked us to take care of your children?

-Did you have sex while you were supposed to be taking care of our children?- Bernadette glared at them.

-Oh please, Sheldon told me that you gave Benadryl to the kids so you can have sex in the bathtub yesterday- Amy said. Howard and Bernadette blushed.

-Well ...- Bernadette said after a few seconds -Tell us about it!- Sheldon looked at Amy and she nodded.

-Very well. I will tell you how it was that we ended up having coitus again in your room- said Sheldon- Amy seduced me.

-Amyyy! - Bernadette looked at her friend with a smile.

-What? -Asked his wife surprised-I didn't seduce you!

-Of course you did!

-Sheldon, you were the one...

-Stop. Tell us exactly how it was that everything began so that Bernadette and I decided who was the one who seduced whom.

Sheldon opened his mouth to speak but his wife put her hand to his mouth.

-I'll tell you- she said and he simply nodded.

 _-I still can not believe you forced me to come- Sheldon complained._

 _-I wasn't going to take care of two small children alone!_

 _-Well, you would have told them to look for someone else._

 _-There was no time to look for someone else. Stuart had a date with Denisse. Raj a dinner with Anu's friends. Leonard and Penny are in ..._

 _-Ok. I get it._

 _-And I don't know why you're complaining, if you haven't done anything. I was the one who bathed them, put them in their pajamas and put them to sleep._

 _-I watched them while you were in the bathroom.- She rolled her eyes._

 _-And at once I warn you that the day we have children you will have to help me- she added- Because I don't have intention to do it alone._

 _-Of course I'm going to help you._

 _-Really? Because at this moment you don't seem very helpful-she said when she saw him sitting on the sofa while she was picking up the toys._

 _-I'm serious. I will help you raise our children._

 _-I don't know if I can believe you. At this moment I am doing everything._

 _-You know I've never been a fan of children, or anything that has to do with them ... But I'm sure that when we have a baby it will be different._

 _-How are you so sure?_

 _-Because they will be a small part of you and a small part of me, and that will turn them into exceptional children._

-I don't know whether to say aww because that was very nice or say hey! By insinuating that my children are not exceptional -complained Bernadette with a smile.

-Well, about that...

-Sheldon!

-You don't even know what I was going to say, Amy!

-Would be better if you continue telling us how you seduced Sheldon- Howard asked him.

-I did not seduce him!- Amy crossed her arms but continued counting.

 _-What do you want to do while we take advantage of the fact that the children are asleep? -Asked Amy sitting next to her husband._

 _-You choose._

 _-Very well-she look around the room and saw where Howard had all his movies and series. She stood up. -Do you want to watch a movie?_

 _-Sure._

 _-I think you would like this- she said putting the disc on the dvd._

 _-How did you know I wanted to see that?- He ask, surprised to see that she had put the league of justice._

 _-I didn't know. I just wanted to see Henry Cavill without a shirt-she saw how Sheldon was frowning so she kissed his on the cheek._

 _They had about 20 minutes watching the movie when Amy got a message on her cell phone so she stopped hugging Sheldon to pick up her cell phone._

 _\- Is it Bernadette? Are they coming? Can we go now?-he ask, looking at Amy._

 _-No, it's Denisse- she smiled as she read the message._

 _-They will come to take care of the children? How nice! - He stood up excitedly._

 _-No. She's just letting me know that tomorrow she's finally getting the comic I've been waiting for-she said with a smile._

 _-Did you ask for a comic? - She nodded- But you don't like to read comics._

 _-I did not like it, but after that time I wanted to pretend to read a comic to be able to talk with you about them, I don't know, I liked it and I've been reading since then- she wait for Sheldon to said something but he only looked at her strangely- What are...? -She could not finish the question because her husband had started kissing her passionately.- Sheldon, are we going to...?-she ask between kisses._

 _-Only if you want- he said, still kissing her._

 _-Oh yes! -They were kissing for a while until he stopped- What's wrong? -Asked something agitated by the kiss._

 _-Nothing. But I would prefer that we do it in Howard and Bernadette's room._

 _-Are you sure about that?_

 _-It's not like it's the first time we have coitus in their room-both smiled at remembering when they did it on Amy's birthday._

 _-Okay- Amy grabbed the baby monitor and then looked at her husband- Come on!_

 _They had just entered the room when Sheldon kissed her again while he was taking her to the bed, began to unbutton her sweater..._

-I don't need to know that!- Said Howard, covering his ears.

-I thought you wanted to know- said Sheldon confused.

-I wanted to know how it convinced you, not how you did it!

-You miss it. It was a very pleasant night-Sheldon said looking with a smile at his wife who smiled back. - Well, now you know how this little Vixen seduced me.

-She did not seduce you!- Bernadette said.

-Thank you- Amy smiled.

-Of course she did! Didn't you not hear how the league of justice showed me and then started talking about comics?

-Yes, I heard. But she did all that because she wanted not to seduce you.

-Yes, but...

-Just admit that you feel extremely attracted to your wife-Howard told him happy to see his robotic friend becoming a real boy.

-Obviously I'm physically and mentally attracted to her- Amy kissed him on the cheek.

\- And how was it that you ended up using our bathroom?

-Well…

 _-That was wild- said Sheldon still breathing with difficulty._

 _-It was- Amy confirmed, still on Sheldon's lap._

 _-Honey, no matter how much we enjoy this- he ran his hands over her back and left them on her butt-You should let me go and bathe in case the children wake up._

 _-Are you going to bathe?- She arched her eyebrow and he nodded.-You did not do it last time._

 _-Because we went quickly to our apartment and at this moment I don't know how long it will take to our friends to come._

 _-You don't even have a towel here- he kissed her on the lips before standing-_

 _-I'll fix it._

 _-Okay- she spanked him when Sheldon passed her._

 _-Amy! - scolded her, although she could see that he was trying not to smile._

 _Amy was finishing dressing when she heard Michael's crying on the monitor. She quickly buttoned her sweater buttons and left the room. Minutes later Sheldon found her sitting by the cribs and with Michael in her arms while drinking milk from his bottle._

 _-Hello- he said and her look up at him._

 _-Hey baby- there was a noise and both turned to see Halley who had thrown a toy out of the crib and was extending her arms for Sheldon to take her out of the crib._

 _-Don't think about it-said Sheldon, looking at the little girl who looked like she was about to cry. -That will not work for me._

 _-Sheldon, please- Amy asked him and he sighed resignedly- Fine- approached the crib and took the girl in his arms._

 _-And what am I supposed to do with her?-he ask, trying to keep Halley from filling him with slime._

 _-Sit on the carpet and play with her._

 _-I'm not going to do that.- Amy frowned -Sometimes it bothers me how easy you can convince me to do some things._

 _-If it were easy, it wouldn't have taken me 8 years to get this- she joke, pointing to her ring on her finger._

 _-What ... what are you doing? - He ask to see that Halley had a book in her hands and tried to sit on Sheldon's lap._

 _-I think she want Uncle Sheldon to read a story to her- said Amy smiling._

 _\- Can't you do it?_

 _-I'm a little busy at the moment -she answer with Michael about to fall asleep in her arms._

 _-Fine- he let the girl sit on his lap and began to read the story while Halley listened to him carefully. Minutes later Sheldon finished the story and realized that Halley had fallen asleep while hugging him- This can not be possible! I'm supposed to be a man of science, not a snuggle bunny!-He complained and his wife could not help but smile broadly at such a tender image._

-Uncle Shelly, enjoy taking care of his nephews-Howard said with a smile.

-I forbid you to tell the others about this.

-They have to know!

-Howard!

-Well, I will not say anything- he crossed his arms- But what about Uncle Shelly and Aunt Amy take care of their nephews tomorrow.

-Amy, let's go! - He stood up and grabbed his wife's arm.

-What? Why?

-I don't intend to go through that torture again- he enter the house followed by Amy- I have two PhD. I'm not a nanny!

"I can't believe that this is the same Sheldon I met- Bernadette said, looking around where her friends had left.

-I think he's finally a real boy- Howard said smiling too.


End file.
